Marriage is between two imperfect people in an attempt to form a perfect union. Our soulmates are expected to complement all our shortfalls. To be our ying to their yang. However, that is not always the case. Most times we bring a set of ideals to the table that could complement or bring us to our knees. However, we are going to focus on the husband as he is the head of the house in comparison to Jesus as the head of the church. The Bible has a clear role for all husbands. Let’s jump in to see what Bible verses say about husbands.
Man And Woman
In Genesis, the Bible speaks about the first marriage which was between a man and a woman. The Man was created to rule over the animals. The woman was created to be the man’s helper. Together they were to work and create a life to share. Their main jobs were to care for the animals but to also begin to populate the world.
They were to be like one making all decisions for their household. They were to love God and love each other. However, Eve was deceived by Satan to eat the fruit of the tree and to give some to her husband. Consequently, even though Adam may not have been deceived by Satan, he knew that it was wrong. He went so far as to blame Eve for this transgression that led to the great fall from God. At any point, Adam could have said no to Eve instead of allowing acceptance of their fate.
As the head of the wife, it was Adam’s responsibility to keep them both safe. That is why this sin is attributed to Adam. Was there love and respect in all the decisions that were made that fateful day? Where do love and respect stand with our own husbands in the household?
“And Adam was not the one deceived; it was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner.” 1 Timothy 2:14 NIV
“When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.” Genesis 3:6 NIV
“For as in Adam all die, so in Christ all will be made alive.” 1 Corinthians 15:22 NIV
Love and Husbands
God’s Word encourages us as followers of Jesus to love God and love one another as we love ourselves. This also goes especially for husbands. A Biblical husband is to love their wives as if they were their own bodies. When we love someone as much as we love ourselves, we are more likely to treat them well. Therefore, if you are showing love to your wife, it is a strong indicator that you also love and value yourself. Hence, a husband should never mistreat his wife using harsh words and tones or physically abuse her. The Christian husband should never exhibit a lack of self-control in the presence of his wife regardless of feeling frustrated or tired after a long day. Such a thing would never be considered if he truly loves his wife as himself.
This love should be a love where the husband would be willing to give his life for her as Jesus gave his life for the church. The love of a good wife should be the most important thing in his life and is part of God’s plan. Out of this love should come a woman’s respect for her husband.
“In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.” Ephesians 5:28 NIV
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” Ephesians 5:25 NIV
“However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” Ephesians 5:33 NIV
Respect Of Husband
One cannot help but respect a person that treats them well. This kind of respect comes from a love that makes one feel valued in the relationship. A relationship that encourages each person as equal participants in building love and respect for each other. Respect begins with being heard in the relationship and working together for common goals based on the instruction of the Lord.
It was this same instruction that told the man he should leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife. The bond of marriage should be held together by love and respect. Therefore, every effort should be made to find that one person that they can love. Hence, together you should build respect for each other. This biblical love should lead to working together to provide for each other. They will also work to provide for their family until the children leave to form their own family. This is based on the word of God and provides the grace of life.
“In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.” 1 Peter 3:7 NLT
“That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” Genesis 2:24 NIV
Husband And Wife Partnership
Eve’s main purpose was to be Adam’s helper. That is what she was created by God to do. The man was not meant to be alone. He was created in the image of God and put in a deep sleep so that God could create his own wife for him. They were to be partners working as God designed. For a husband finds a good thing in his wife.
As God clearly outlines the way husbands should treat their wives. However, there are many verses on the way a married woman is to act towards her husband. Therefore, she can be a good thing for her husband to have favor in the household from the Lord. Proverbs will outline the things she can do to be a blessing to her husband (Proverbs 31). This is why the husband should love his Christian wife who is considered the equal but weaker vessel in the relationship. This same love should last until her beauty fades.
So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. Genesis 1:17 NIV
He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord. Proverbs 18:22 NIV
May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. Proverbs 5:18 NIV
Proverbs 31 Woman
The wife is to be trustworthy and bring good to her husband. She is to take care of the household and work outside of the home. Review Proverbs 31 Wife.
“A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands. She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar. She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants. She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks.
She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night. In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy. When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet. She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes. She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.” Proverbs 31:10-27 NIV
A Servant Leader
Jesus is the head of every man. In that position, Jesus came to serve. He was the ultimate servant leader, and all men should use Him as their model for leading their wives. Therefore, as a biblical husband, he should be led by the Holy Spirit. In the partnership with his Christian wife, using every opportunity to serve her. Similarly, as man is to submit to Christ, the wife should submit to her husband. Hence, as the head of the woman comes a great deal of responsibility to protect and shield her from harm even from himself. As the man trusts the woman to take care of him, she must also trust him enough to submit to him.
Submitting to God can be difficult at times for man. The same can be said of a wife having to submit to her husband. It takes a great deal of faith. However, Christ is the head of the church, and it is difficult for members of His body to fully trust and have faith in Jesus at times. Jesus spoke often of our lack of faith. For to truly be part of God’s Kingdom we have to have faith. This is how we can please God.
But I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God. 1 Corinthians 11:3 NIV
For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Ephesians 5:23 NIV
And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him. Hebrews 11:6 NIV
Unbelieving Husband Or Wife
Being married and living in the world can be difficult. There are many challenges to making a marriage work. Everyone brings their past experiences and beliefs to the table. Hence, should you find yourself with an unbelieving husband he may not have the same biblical love for you. However, God is with you so you should be in prayer for your husband. Pray through the Holy Spirit for the husband’s unbelief. Jesus will present this prayer to God and God will answer you.
Likewise, a husband should be in prayer for his unbelieving wife. He should treat her with respect and love her so that his prayers will not be hindered in any way. Following the Lord of hosts will lead to understanding and provide the wisdom to lead your wife or husband to salvation. The unbelievable spouse is sanctified by their respective believing spouse.
For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. 1 Corinthians 7:14 NIV
“To God belong wisdom and power; counsel and understanding are his. Job 12:13 NIV
Pray For Spouses
Prayer is a powerful thing and can move mountains. As long as you follow the understanding way of Christ that leads to eternal life, God’s grace and mercy will sustain you. This will enable you to live in harmony until the day your spouse accepts Jesus as their Lord and Savior. However, if that day never comes strive to make their life as joyful as you can. Their life on earth will be the closest, they come to heaven. They have the opportunity to accept the keys of heaven by accepting Jesus. Therefore, be in continuous prayer for them.
I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven; whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.” Matthew 16:19 NIV
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. James 5:16 NIV
pray continually, 1 Thessalonians 5:17 NIV
Jesus Is Our Groom
Jesus is our groom, and we are his bride. As we wait for the groom, we should be mindful of following our savior Jesus Christ. We should listen and be prepared for His coming. Our joy will one day be complete upon His return. We will live together in His Kingdom because we have been made blameless and without stain by His sacrifice. We once were sinners living in our transgression, but we are now washed clean of our sins. Therefore, we are sanctified and justified in the name of Jesus. We can now freely receive God’s love. For the limited time that we are on Earth, every effort should be made to be reconciled to God. Upon accepting Jesus as your Lord and Savior and by the power of the Holy Spirit.
The bride belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom’s voice. That joy is mine, and it is now complete. John 3:29 NIV
and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. Ephesians 5:27 NIV
And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God. 1 Corinthians 6:11 NIV
Every married man should strive to be a good husband. Whether you are married to holy women or unbelievers you should strive to love them as you love yourself. The Bible teaches they are the bone of my bones and should be loved and respected. They are your lifelong partners. Therefore, you should choose wisely so you are not unequally yoked.
The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” Genesis 2:23 NIV
Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? 2 Corinthians 6:14 NIV
Biblical Husbands should:
- Love their wives.
- Respect their wives.
- Treat them as equal partners.
- Submit to God as a wife submits to her husband.
- Work together with the wife to foster a united household.
- Pray for your wife.
- Choose your life-long partner wisely.